"₿ Is Within My Wallet"

By Eric · Updated October 17, 2026

Satire and commentary: names and likenesses are used for parody, and nothing here is a statement of fact about real people. Sourced facts are in the sections below.

“₿ Is Within My Wallet" (Tune: “Nearer, My God, to Thee”
Hymn #338)

Verse 1
₿ is within my wallet still,
Though banks may close, I fear no ill.
My seed is carved upon my heart,
Alone, yet free, I stand apart.

Chorus
Hallelujah ₿-men!
Praise Satoshi's holy name!
Each block filled with grace and truth,
Decentralized, my soul is claimed.

Verse 2
When miners’ hum begins to rise,
The chain confirmed, no need for lies.
Though fiat crumbles into dust,
My blockchain stands, in it I trust.

Chorus
Hallelujah ₿-men!
Praise Satoshi's holy name!
Each block filled with grace and truth,
Decentralized, my soul is claimed.

Verse ³ (Finale)
Though rugs be pulled across the land,
Today I HODL, firm I stand.
Remember pizza, bought too soon,
Till ₿ hits one million moon!

Final Chorus
Hallelujah ₿-men!
Keep my wallet safe, I pray.
When the final block is mined,
In Satoshi’s arms, I’ll stay.

In plain words: what this means

This is a parody hymn, sung to the tune of an old church hymn. Song notes on the real things in it. Checked on October 17, 2026.

Lines you can check

"Remember pizza, bought too soon." On May 22, 2010, programmer Laszlo Hanyecz traded 10,000 BTC for two Papa John's pizzas, which the Bitcoin Wiki calls the first documented purchase of a good with bitcoin. The Wiki quotes the price at about $41 at the time (Bitcoin Wiki: Laszlo Hanyecz). The community now celebrates it as Bitcoin Pizza Day.
"My seed is carved upon my heart." A joke about the recovery phrase. Real advice is the opposite: write it down and store it in more than one place. See our seedkeeping explainer.
"When miners' hum begins to rise, the chain confirmed." Miners add a block about every ten minutes by design (Bitcoin Wiki: Difficulty).
"Till Bitcoin hits one million moon." A wish, not a forecast. Nobody knows future prices.

Why the pizza matters

Not because of what the pizza would be "worth" today, but because it was the first time Bitcoin was used as money for a real thing. That is the actual milestone.

A work of satire and commentary. Historical summaries are simplified and may contain errors. Not financial, legal, or tax advice.