This is the full table of contents of the satirical scripture. It is split into the Old Chainament (history and cautionary tales), the New Chainment (epistles on how to live with Bitcoin), and the Anthems (parody hymns). The Apocrypha below are the odd leftovers.
Everything here is parody. Most chapters have a Fact check or In plain words section underneath that checks the real facts against primary sources. Nothing is investment advice.
Why a scripture? Because Bitcoin’s history is full of stories people retell like legends: a founder who vanished, an exchange that lost the coins, a split that divided a community. Telling them as scripture makes them easier to remember, and the jokes are the sugar. The serious part is underneath each chapter, where we separate what is documented from what is poetry and link the sources. If you want the plain guides first, start with the Field Notes or the Glossary. If you want the stories, pick a book above.