The Sixteenth Epistle – The Epistle of Custody Rejection
By Eric · Updated October 17, 2026
Satire and commentary: names and likenesses are used for parody, and nothing here is a statement of fact about real people. Sourced facts are in the sections below.
The Sixteenth Epistle – The Epistle of Custody Rejection “The moment you lose your keys, your freedom vanishes with them.”
1:1 Brothers and sisters, You say you made a wallet, But if the keys were left on an exchange, It was never yours to begin with.
1:2 I have seen it— Those who entrusted their ₿ to custodial accounts Were frozen alongside When the accounts were frozen.
“He who entrusts his assets Has already surrendered his freedom.”
Custody Rejection 1:2
1:3 Satoshi, without a word, Showed us the path of self-custody. He gave each user a wallet And opened every block to all.
1:4 Yet many chose convenience, Leaning on exchanges and custodial platforms— And in that choice, Their freedom became captivity.
1:5 I say unto you— “If you do not hold the keys, It is not your ₿.”
1:6 Therefore, Walk as Satoshi intended. Hold your own wallet. Engrave your 24 words As scripture upon your heart, And reclaim the freedom of self-custody.
1:7 For this is the true meaning of: “Not Your Keys, Not Your Coins.”
₿men.
In plain words: what this means
The scripture is satire. "Not your keys, not your coins" is a real safety idea, and bitcoin.org says something very close to it. Checked on October 17, 2026.
The idea in plain words
Whoever holds the private keys controls the coins. If you leave coins on an exchange, the exchange holds the keys. Bitcoin.org puts it this way: "When a third party controls your keys, you rely entirely on their security and honesty." It advises preferring wallets where you hold your own keys, and if you use a custodial service, choosing it carefully and turning on strong multi-factor authentication (bitcoin.org: Secure your wallet).
If you hold your own keys, the checklist is short
Back up the recovery phrase. For most modern wallets, one backup of the phrase can restore all past and future addresses. Check how your wallet works.
Keep copies in more than one physical place. One copy is a single point of failure.
Encrypt any backup that lives online. Online backups are very vulnerable to theft.
Do not forget your password. If you encrypt a wallet and lose the password, the funds are permanently lost.
Consider a hardware wallet. Bitcoin.org calls them "the best balance between very high security and ease of use," and says you can recover funds if you lose the device.
The honest trade
Self-custody removes the risk that a company freezes or loses your coins. It adds the risk that you lose your own backup. There is no helpline.