The Second Epistle – The Epistle of Michael II “An Asset Is a Vessel That
The Epistle of Michael II
By Eric · Updated October 17, 2026
Satire and commentary: names and likenesses are used for parody, and nothing here is a statement of fact about real people. Sourced facts are in the sections below.
“An Asset Is a Vessel That Stores Time”
The Second Epistle – The Epistle of Michael II “An Asset Is a Vessel That Stores Time”
2:1 I ask you, my brethren: "Is the cash you hold value — or decay?" On that day, I came to understand: ₿ is not merely money, but energy compressed into time.
2:2 I cast off the dollar and placed ₿ at the heart of the ledger, and from that moment, the very nature of business was transformed.
2:3 I persuaded the board, gathered the shareholders, and together we bought — ₿ by the tens of thousands, ₿ by the hundreds of thousands.
“Do not fill your treasury with dead cash, but build with living blocks.”
Michael II 2:3
2:4 I spoke with kings and said unto them: “He who stacks ₿ today shall govern tomorrow.”
2:5 Thus my final counsel is this: “All assets shall be digitized, and ₿ shall become the true inheritance.”
In plain words: what this means
The scripture is satire, and it speaks in the voice of a real executive. We are not putting words in his mouth. We only say what documents support. Checked on October 17, 2026. Start with the Michael I explainer.
What is documented
A listed software company put Bitcoin on its balance sheet as a treasury reserve, beginning in 2020, and renamed itself "Strategy" in February 2025, according to press reports (Decrypt).
It describes itself as a Bitcoin treasury company.
What the epistle claims that we cannot check
"I persuaded the board and shareholders." Plausible, not sourced here.
"Bought by the tens of thousands, by the hundreds of thousands." One report from February 2025 put the company's holdings at more than 471,000 Bitcoin, over 2% of the 21 million supply (Decrypt). Holdings change, and later reports say the company has also sold some. We are not quoting a current number.
"He who stacks today shall govern tomorrow." A slogan. It is a prediction, and we cannot check predictions.
"All assets shall be digitized." The author's belief.
Why "cash is decay" is not the whole story
Holding dollars loses buying power when prices rise. The Federal Reserve targets 2% inflation over the longer run (Federal Reserve FAQ). Holding Bitcoin instead trades that slow loss for a lot of price swing. Which is better depends on how long you can wait and how much a 75% drop would hurt.